Waiting

[Part 8 of Liz’s story of God’s calling into healthcare in an inner city setting.]

Waiting can be challenging. Whether you have been waiting for the next post in this series or waiting for these posts to end, waiting involves patiently holding out hope in the midst of uncertainty, perplexity, and anxiety.

Yet more than waiting for Love’s wise answers, I have been learning more about waiting for Love Himself. In mid-January, I prayed:

“On the way home, as I was thanking You for Your steadfast love,
I realized what You’re calling me to in this season of waiting.
Waiting on You is like pulling out my snuggle blanket
and nestling close to Your heart while listening to the pounding rain.
It’s like taking a rambling hike with You, through the woods,
without a thought to the time or where the path may lead,
because You are holding my hand,
setting the pace,
leading me in Your wisdom, lovingkindness, sovereign power (over all predators!)
with me, intimately, by Your indwelling Spirit.
In this way,
waiting is not about efficiency,
but about intimacy!
I’m not waiting for You to do certain things,
answer particular prayers by a given time;
I’m reveling in the relationship we have right now,
by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I’m waiting—walking with You, at Your pace, enjoying Your presence, content with Your promises and provision….”

The image of Jesus, fast asleep on a cushion in a violently pitching ship, in the midst of pouring rain had been marinating in my mind. And as I played that scenario over and over, I realized that I react similarly to the disciples who scream at Jesus in their anxiety, “Don’t you care that we’re dying?!?” At the same time, I long for growing faith that enables me to curl up on the cushion next to him, finding comfort and rest in his presence.

And the image of hiking so vividly captured my experience of not knowing where I was going, finding the path filled with unexpected switchbacks, recognizing my own limitations in packing or preparing, and enjoying the journey instead of fretfully rushing ahead to the destination.

Waiting, as challenging as it is, doesn’t have to feel like you’re sitting outside the principal’s office. It can be a leisurely hike with your most trusted, intimate, powerful, loving, wise Friend (who also happens to be the Creator, Savior, and Ruler of the world).